Successful People Allow Success to Happen

When you implement your fourth quarter Action Plan, be aware that there are some basic and necessary behaviors that you must adopt to create the conditions for the success of your plan.  It can be oh-so-easy to get pulled off your game by people and circumstances that make demands on your time, adversely impacting your energy levels and ability to focus as they do.

You must learn to be “healthy selfish” and strive to preserve your boundaries. Be prepared for some people to get indignant. You may even be attacked by those who feel the most entitled. It’s uncomfortable, but you’ll come to know who our friends are and are not. Consider the process a character development and leadership lesson.

Those who love and respect us give us space to do our thing. They touch base with us every once in a while. They step in to offer assistance and encouragement when we are in need. They never devolve into controlling and manipulative behavior.

I.    Just say no

If you are not able to take on a certain project or agree to a commitment, then respectfully decline. Perhaps you already have many irons in the fire and your schedule is filled. Perhaps you would rather take it easy for a while, resting and recharging your energy stores.

If a proposal doesn’t feel right, seems unorthodox or unsavory, you are not obligated to participate. Those who have vowed to sweet-talk (or arm-twist) you into this arrangement may become furious. Let them do just that. Then cut them out of your life. The last thing you need in your life are manipulators and bullies.

II.   Define boundaries

Everyone likes to be liked. We feel good when we help others and make them happy. But the price of acceptance does not hinge upon the “right” of others to violate our boundaries.  When you feel pressured or uncomfortable by a certain request, recognize that feeling as a sign that your boundaries are being violated.

Someone is attempting to “cross a line”.  Someone does not know his/her place, or role, in the relationship that the two of you are in, even if that someone is a parent or sibling. No one has a “right” to violate boundaries. Politely, but firmly and resolutely, push back and do not allow yourself to be bullied. If the violator persists, well, now you know who loves and respects you and who doesn’t. It can be a bitter lesson.

III.  Ask for it

What do you want? The sale? The assignment? Your team to work at 110% capacity? If you want it, then ask for it!

You must also be prepared to earn it, to demonstrate that you deserve the reward. If you expect your team to work at 110%, then you must work at least that hard and more. If you want the sale or the contract, then show the client why you deserve it and how hard you’ll work to earn it and then fulfill or exceed all expectations when it is awarded to you.

IV.  Release the negative

Mistakes are made and bad things sometimes happen. You may feel hurt and maybe resentful, too. Maybe you should let yourself wallow in those feelings for a while because after all, you are human.  However, you cannot allow yourself to remain stuck in the quicksand of negative feelings. Take a deep breath and then let it go as you step forward toward your vision of a successful future. You have goals and an action plan to help you reach them. Let that propel you out of the muck of resentment. Success is the best revenge.

V.   Walk, don’t run

OK so you’re on a roll, you have a timetable, you want to get things done. This is a one-page, 90-day action plan you’re working through, you say! Patience may not be considered a virtue and explaining things twice becomes an aggravation. Due diligence can happen some other time?

Stop. Breathe. Look at the big picture. Remember now, an ounce of prevention is worth many pounds of cure. Avoid cutting corners. Do not get slap-dash. Some on your pumped-up, charging team may get a bit frustrated, but make sure that your execution is accurate and that you are moving in the direction that will bring about the desired outcomes. Take the time to get buy-in of key stakeholders. You will be successful if you allow success to happen!

Thanks for reading,

Kim

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